In counseling, we often see patients whose lives are not in line with there values and expectations.
The bigger the gap, the bigger the stress it seems.
To close the gap, we only have 3 options.
- We can help them to find or create a life that is congruent with their values and expectations. It’s about making changes to the outside world i.e. the external locus of control OR
- We can help them to change or defuse/detach from their values and expectations to be in line with their life. This is more about changing our internal world and how we perceive things i.e. the internal locus of control OR
- We can help them to change both.
Whichever way, the first step is have clarity around what those values and expectations actually are.