Helping our patients balance the focus on self versus the focus on others

In counseling, we often see the “extremes” of things. Things that have moved too far away from the middle bit of the bell curve, causing adjustment problems with stress responses.

One of those common “extremes” is the “extreme focus on self” vs the “extreme focus on others”.

Each have their own sets of positives and negatives.

Metaphorically speaking, if we look at quality of a brick wall, if “self/self development” is like the quality of the individual bricks, then “others/the relationships” is like the quality of the mortar that binds all the bricks together.

Focusing too much on the mortar but neglecting the bricks, or vice versa will impact on the strength of the wall.

So focusing too much on others but neglecting self, or vice versa will also cause problems.