Sunday, January 31, 2021

Helping our patients clarify their values and who they are, and take committed actions towards a life more true to who they are

When one is not living a life that is in line with one’s values and who they are, it can get exhausting. It’s like walking up the hill. The further away one is from one’s values, the steeper the climb. The body and mind will let you know for sure.

I see many of these folks, and I am sure you do too.

So why do people do it?

Often the answer is....

1. To blend in
2. To fit in
3. To survive
4. To be accepted
5. Upbringing
6. Fear of being judged
7. Fear of rejection
8. Fear of negative consequences due to past experienced
9. Fear of standing out, and be labeled as weird or “not normal”.

So we blend in. We may do it very well. So well in fact, that nobody really knows. But that will come at price.

There are alternatives. 

1. Blend in with full acceptance rather than “tolerance” or resentment. Not easy when one is exhausted. 
2. Find your “tribe” so that there are less requirements for blending in. 
3. Teach others, especially those close to you, more about you so that they have the opportunity to blend into you. 
4. A combination of the above. 

Whatever one chooses, clarification of values and who we are, is a must. 

If one has been “blending” excessively due to circumstances, there is a positive. Now one has the ability to “blend”. 

It just need some “fine tuning” and “retitration”. 

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