Allowing others “to feel how they feel”, and still care for them in a compassionate and assertive way

One of the key skills we try to help some of our Doctors/Registrars develop is the ability to allow our patients “to feel how they feel”, and still care for them in a compassionate and assertive way.

What can we do when our patients are disappointed with us? When they are unhappy with us. When they are demanding and frustrated with us. When they disagree and get angry with us. These interactions may cause undue stress.

The good news is, we don’t always need to avoid these “unpleasant feelings”, fix them, make them go away, or act on them straight away. We can use it purely as information to consider for assertive action if it’s relevant.

If you happen to struggle in this space, may 2021 bring you more acceptance to “allow others to feel how they feel”, and not be too stressed by them. Allowing others “to feel how they feel”, may give us more clarity to take more effective actions, rather than avoid or react to their feelings in unhelpful ways.