Thursday, September 22, 2022

Are you an “internal locus of control person” or an “external locus of control person”


In counseling or coaching, it’s really important to give people the emotional literacy to understand themselves.  It helps with emotional processing. It helps with conflict resolution.  

One of those is the awareness and understanding of certain biases that we all possess. 

For example…

Some of us are more biased towards the “external locus of control” when faced with a problem. 

Some of us are more biased towards the “internal locus of control”.  

Some of us are 50:50 or something around there perhaps.  

When we are triggered emotionally from an event, the “external control person” may ask, why do you make me feel this way? And then try to change that.  

Compare to the “internal locus control person”, they may ask, what is it about my internal principles, truths, rules, values, beliefs and narratives, that make me feel this way?  And then try to change that.  

Do you know which one you are more biased towards?

If you are uncertain, for those with a partner, reflect on your partner perhaps.  Chances are, you may be the opposite.  

To navigate the world well, one needs both internal and external locus of control.  Change what we can, and hold space for the stuff that we can’t.  

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