Saturday, May 1, 2021

Having difficult relationships in our lives can help us to understand ourselves

The wonderful thing about General Practice is our ability to meet and interact with such a diverse group of human beings through our consultation rooms.

There are people that we like and click with instantly. Then there are those whose wavelength is completely different to ours, and give us much tension. And of course, there are many folks in between.

Sometimes, it is the interaction with the ones who are completely different to us, that will give us the most insight about ourselves. It can provide the contrast to give us clarity about ourselves.

If we strongly “love” and hate those who are quite “inner compass” orientated, then that’s a sign that we are more “outer compass” orientated. “Outer compass” is a term I use to describe folks who tend to take actions more based on the thinking, rules, and feelings of others/society.  They are more pragmatic or better at conforming perhaps.  They may not be as good at being in touch with their values and following a life that is true to who they are. 

“Inner compass orientation” is used to describe a tendency to take actions more based on inner principles or values/internal feelings. Does it feel right? Is it aligning with my values? Am I being authentic? Can others be authentic too and living life true to who they are?  They are better at living a life true to who they are, and accepting others for who they are.

If we strongly “love” and hate those who are detached in nature, then that may indicate that we are more “zoomed in”/fused in nature.

If we strongly “love” and hate those who are “heady” in nature, then that may point to a more “hearty” nature in us.

So embrace those “painful interactions” as an opportunity for self discovery perhaps. That can be a good reframe in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT).

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