Thursday, December 10, 2020

Helping our patients with the emotional literacy around the inner conflict between their internal values or schemas

In counseling, it’s not uncommon to see folks who have strong inner conflict between their values or schemas. It’s often the opposing values or schemas that they may find very difficult to reconcile.

One of those is self sacrifice versus self preservation/entitlement. One is all about others, and the other is about self.

If not careful and unbalanced, people tend to swing from one extreme to the other.

When self sacrifice and putting the needs of others excessively first, they think, “What about me?”

When focusing on themselves and looking after themselves first, they think or feel bad for being “selfish” or “self centered”.

Swinging from one end to another can manifest as “burnout”. Of course, it’s a tough gig trying to balance these opposing elements, especially if we are not aware. Finding that sweet spot is often challenging.

Can you relate or see patients like the above?

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